The start of a new school year is full of excitement with new classrooms, new routines, and new opportunities for your child to learn and grow. It’s also the perfect time to make sure their teacher understands their unique strengths, challenges, and needs.
For parents of children with developmental, behavioral, or emotional differences, clear communication with teachers is key to ensuring the school year starts off on the right foot. Whether your child has an Individualized Education Program (IEP), receives therapy, or just benefits from certain classroom strategies, having an open, supportive relationship with teachers can make all the difference.
At Behaven Kids, we work with families every day to help children succeed at school and beyond. Here’s our guide to approaching these important conversations with confidence and compassion.
Why is Early Communication important?
Teachers may have dozens of students, but they want each child to feel supported. The earlier you share helpful information, the faster they can adapt lessons, routines, or expectations to set your child up for success.
Early communication:
- Prevents misunderstandings and misinterpretations of behavior
- Builds trust between you, your child, and the teacher
- Ensures support strategies are in place before challenges arise
- Opens the door for ongoing dialogue throughout the school year
Step 1: Gather Your Child’s Support Information
Before meeting with your child’s teacher, take time to organize your thoughts and gather any documents that will help explain your child’s needs. These might include:
- IEP or 504 Plan
- Behavior intervention plan
- Therapy notes or recommendations (with permission from providers)
- Information on any medical or sensory needs
- A “strengths and challenges” list to provide a balanced view
Having these ready shows that you are prepared and committed to working together. Here is a template to aid in conversation too!
Step 2: Focus on Strengths as Well as Needs
When introducing your child to a new teacher, it’s natural to focus on challenges you hope the school will address. But starting with strengths helps the teacher see your child as a whole person. Here are some helpful tips on speaking about autism!
You might share:
- Skills they’ve mastered (academic or social)
- Subjects or activities they enjoy
- Personality traits you love (sense of humor, creativity, empathy)
By leading with the positives, you create a more collaborative tone and encourage the teacher to see your child’s potential.
Step 3: Be Specific About What Works
Teachers appreciate concrete examples of strategies that help your child thrive. Instead of saying, “They need help focusing,” you might say:
- “They focus better with short, clear instructions.”
- “They benefit from a 2-minute transition warning before changing activities.”
- “They stay calmer when they have access to a small fidget during lessons.”
The more specific you can be, the easier it will be for the teacher to put those supports into practice.
Step 4: If Your Child Attends ABA Therapy During the School Day
Some children benefit from ABA therapy sessions that take place during school hours, either at school with a therapist present or by leaving campus for part of the day.
If this applies to your child:
- Communicate the schedule early. Let the teacher know the exact times and days your child will be in therapy so they can plan lessons accordingly.
- Explain the benefits. Share how ABA supports your child’s learning, behavior, or emotional regulation, and how it complements what’s happening in the classroom.
- Coordinate transitions. Work with the teacher and therapist to make transitions smooth by providing a visual schedule or giving your child a “5-minute warning” before leaving class.
- Share progress. Ask your ABA provider to give the teacher regular updates so strategies can be reinforced in both settings. This consistency can make therapy gains transfer more effectively into the school environment.
When schools, parents, and therapy teams collaborate, children can keep learning momentum in both settings without feeling disrupted by the changes in location or routine.
Step 5: Keep It a Conversation, Not a List of Demands
Approach the meeting with a team mindset. Ask questions like:
- “How do you usually handle transitions?”
- “What’s the best way for me to share updates if I notice something new at home?”
- “How can we work together to keep strategies consistent between home, school, and therapy?”
Teachers often have creative solutions and may be able to adapt your suggestions in ways that fit their classroom environment.
Step 6: Maintain Ongoing Communication
One meeting at the start of the year isn’t enough. Keep in touch through:
- Email updates or a communication notebook
- Scheduled check-ins every few weeks
- Quick conversations at pick-up or drop-off
Share successes as well as challenges. If your child has a great day, letting the teacher know reinforces the idea that you are partners in celebrating progress.
Step 7: Advocate Without Becoming Adversarial
Advocating for your child means speaking up when you notice unmet needs—but it also means staying solution-focused. If you disagree with a decision, try saying:
- “I understand why that approach works for some students, but here’s why I’m concerned it may not work for my child. Can we explore other options?”
- “I’ve noticed this strategy isn’t helping at home—what have you seen in the classroom?”
This keeps the tone respectful and collaborative, even when challenges arise.
Step 8: Involve Your Child When Appropriate
For older children, involving them in the conversation can help them feel empowered. They might share:
- What helps them feel comfortable
- How they prefer to ask for help
- Their favorite ways to learn
This not only builds self-advocacy skills but also strengthens the teacher-student relationship.
The Behaven Kids Perspective
We know that every child’s learning journey is unique, and that having a supportive school team is a huge part of their success. Many of our families tell us that the most effective school years happen when parents, teachers, and therapists all work together toward the same goals.
If your child receives services through Behaven Kids, our team can help you prepare for teacher meetings, share effective strategies, and even collaborate directly with the school to ensure consistency.
Conclusion
Talking to teachers about your child’s needs doesn’t have to be intimidating. By starting early, focusing on strengths, sharing clear strategies, and coordinating with therapy schedules, you can help create a positive, supportive school environment where your child can shine.